About Me

Name: Raven
Home: Ohio, United States
About Me: Married, 2 kids, 3 step-kids, 3 cats and a mini-doxie
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Friday, April 28, 2006
4 things
I'm bored. Nothing really new to write about at the moment. I'm going to go downstairs and do a little spring cleaning in a moment, but to help me avoid that for a little while, I stole this...

2. Invacare
3. First Union Real Estate Investement
4. Air Force (There are more than these but these had the most impact)

1. Independence Day (things go boom)
2. Total Recall (same reason)
3. Hitch (I love Will Smith)
4. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (Sean Connery nd Harrison Ford, tied up together...can you say yummm?)

1. Avon Lake
2. Elyria
3. Omaha
4. Bellvue

1. Amazing Race
2. Smallville (Yes I know it's a teeny bopper show...I still like it and have the first two seasons on DVD)
3. CSI
4. Sopranos

1. Windsor
2. Las Vegas
3. Phoenix
4. Mackinac Island

1. Yahoo
2. Dear Abby
3. Daily Ink(need my comics everyday)
4. Blogger

1. Melting Pot (Going there for our anniversary in June)
2. Cabin Club
3. Panera
4. Daishin's (went there for my birthday last month)

1. Steak
2. Potatos (any potatos, I'm not picky)
3. Thin Mints
4. Double Noodle Chicken Soup

1. King Size Bed (semi made)
2. Computer
3. TV
4. Shoes (I don't have a shoe rack so they are sort of scattered about the room)

1. Red Gypsy Skirt
2. White Short sleeve shirt
3. Control Top Panyhose (the bane of women who have had children)
4. Black ankle boots

1. Carribean
2. Vegas
3. Windsor
4. Michigan (with hubby)

That's it...There is no more. Guess I have to go do the cleaning now. Ick! Everyone hope for rain...I don't want to mow the grass tomorrow.
posted by Raven @ 8:42 PM   5 comments
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Becoming Numb
I've been depressed before. Done the whole round of medication, worked my way back to a "normal" life. When I was in depression life was happening in a mist that I fought. Things would happen and I could not respond in what would be considered a normal manner because of the mist.
If you read this post you will know that things have not been going my way lately. Not that I have a charmed life or anything, but there has been a really bad run these last few weeks. Last Sunday Hubby went back to Albany after spending most of the week with his mother to help her out with his father being in the hospital again. Not 20 minutes after he got there his mother called, his Dad had passed away. The cancer was just too much for his heart and it gave out. Hubby was a devastated. He drove home the next day and we drove up for the viewing and funeral.
I've hit a point that I keep getting hit with these emotional punches and I'm not even feeling them anymore. Just too many too fast. It reminds me of when I was in my depression, not the same but still a numbness that I know just isn't right. It bothers me because I want to mourn my FIL but I'm so tired and numb I just can't right now.
As a side note on top of all of this. I left work early on Monday to get things organized to leave the next day. I have a proclivity for grinding my teeth in my sleep when I'm stressed. My mouth was killing me, I thought it was from the grinding. I get home and Rick wakes up from the nap he was taking (driving 20 hours in the last 30 will do that to you) he takes one look at me and sends me to the dentist, who sends me to another dentist, who sends me to yet another dentist. At the end of all this I end up having to get one of my back molars pulled. Fun stuff. The only upside was the nice nitrous oxide they give you.
posted by Raven @ 10:18 PM   5 comments
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Think Fast
Quick! First thought that comes to mind...

1. I need: A good laugh and a small vacation. Think I'll stop at the pub tonight on my way home, I can usually get both there in an hour.
2. Sex: Whenever Hubby is in the same state as me.
3. Relationships: A lot of damn work.
4. Your Last Ex: Liar, manipulative, thankfully married to someone else now.
5. Power: Expensive, got the gas and electric bill.
6. Marijuana: Legalize it and tax it to death.
7. Crack: More than I want to see of my plumber
8. Food: How many Weight Watcher's points are we talking about?
9. This president: 1/20/09 (his last day in office!!)
10. War: Bush's kids should enlist
11. Cars: Payments (sorry just bought a new car, still waiting for the first bill to show up)
12. Gas Prices: Gouging.
13. Halloween: One of my favorite holidays. I would still trick or treat if I thought I could get away with it.
14. Bon Jovi: Oooohhh, saw him in concert in 1989, what blast.
15. Religion: It should be remembered that the Bible has been interpreted several times since the original version, mainly by men.
16. MySpace: Wonder when my step daughter will realize it's me informing the cops about all of the parties they plan and talk about on their MySpace's
17. Worst Fear: Hubby will die.
18. Marriage: Goes with relationships...a lot of damn work.
19. Fashion: Fun to watch, expensive to own, and uncomfortable to wear. Not me.
20. Brunettes: What I am.
21. Redheads: What I occasionally dye my hair to be.
22: Work: Zzzzzzzz.
23: Pass the time: Read, lot's...anything.
24: Football: Go BRONCO'S!!!
25: One night Stands: In the past thank the gods.
26: Pet Peeve: interrupting me.
27: Pixie Stix: I usually end up chocking my self on the powder.
28: Vanilla Ice: Remember the name, not the music though.
29: Porta Potties: Pee in a crouched position, while not touching the walls.
30: High school: Over thank the gods...especially the last two years. Orange and his group graduated without me!
31: Pajamas: Pajama's? What are those?
32. Wood: Flooring
33. Surfers: A great laugh if they are trying it on Lake Erie
34. Pictures: Forever falling behind on getting them developed.
35. First Love: ran away a lot as my friends and I would chase him down and kiss him on the playground (1st and 2nd grade)

This has been shamelessly stolen off of Redneck's blog. I needed to have little fun.
posted by Raven @ 1:19 PM   7 comments
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
When it rains it pours
I know the title is a really old cliche, but it fits the moment. Easter sucked. There is no better term for it. We went north to my in-laws. My FIL has cancer, a lot of cancer, all over. He also had a heart attack a couple of weeks ago. While we were up there I ran myself ragged trying to give my MIL and the one SIL that live there a break, doing as much as I possibly could to make the holiday easier for them. Around midnight Easter Day night my FIL starts saying he is hot. We take his temperature, no fever. He takes off his sweater, and he is clammy. Thanks to the cancer in his lungs, he can't really tell if anything specific in his chest hurts, everything hurts. So they take him off to the hospital. Yep, he had another heart attack. He is back in the hospital hooked up to a nice morphine drip. They are having real problems stabalizing him so he can go back home.
While we were up north, we had boarded our doggie. We knew something wasn't quite right with her. For one thing, we couldn't keep her water bowl filled. She would slurp it down in record time. Well the vet called my husband's cell phone Easter morning from his home. Sadie was diabetic, a very sever diabetic. He went through the treatment options, but told us he didn't have much hope for them. One because she was so sever and two because Sadie was a rescue dog she had certain quirks about her that would make treating her at home very difficult. She would be in pain much of the time and probably end up blind and possibly lame. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't put Sadie throught that. We came home and then went to the vet and had her put down. Hubby couldn't handle it and had to leave, but I stayed and petted her head and gave her all of the love and attention I could.
Hubby went back up north to help out his mom the next day. The family is going to be taking turns coming into town to help my MIL out for the next month or so. We told the kids about Sadie, while upset they seem to be recovering better than I am.
posted by Raven @ 7:52 AM   3 comments
Monday, April 17, 2006
In Memory of Sadie 1998-2006
I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear.
'It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today, your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wished I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today you tend it with such care
I want to reassure you that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key,
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said 'It's me.'
You looked so very tired and then you sank into a chair,
I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.
It's possible for me to be so near you everyday
To say to you with certainty , 'I never went away.'
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew
That in the stillness of that evening I was very close to you.
The day is over ... I smile and watch you yawning
and say , 'Goodnight, sweet dreams, God bless, I'll see you in the morning.'
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide
I'll rush to greet you and we'll stand together side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there's much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out
Then come home and be with me. "
We loved you and will miss you sweetie! We know you will always be there for us.
posted by Raven @ 9:15 PM   3 comments
Monday, April 03, 2006
The gods heard my plea for mercy!
This terrible time came early this year. I've dreaded this time for the last 7 or 8 years and usually I have until mid May or so to gear myself up for it. To prepare my senses to be assaulted and my will worn down. To be exhausted beyond measure and to crawl home a quivering mass, begging for mercy, and promising myself that next year it will be better. It's swimsuit shopping time.
It came early this year because Mandy is going on he field trip to Washington DC this week. The hotel has a pool and she wanted to be able to swim if she had the time. Now, if you haven't seen my blogs from last summer, Mandy is a challenge to fit...in anything. I just had issues finding her a pair of jeans to fit. She wears a size 3 tall (34inch inseam). But, swimsuits are a nother matter all together. She does not fit a 1 piece...she just doesn't. The ones that are long enough, she could fit another 3 people in there with her. So, we have to go to the 2 pieces. Now, even as skinny as she is...she has a booty, for lack of a better term. So some of the bikini bottoms don't fit well. She also has a very small waist, so the ones that fit her hips gape around her waist. I won't even go into the problems of colors and styles.
So, Saturday I load her into the car and head out for the first place I saw swimsuits...Wally World. I didn't have much hope, but I did see that they sold the bikinis in separate pieces so we had a chance of getting something. We found 2 that she liked the colors and styles in the smallest sizes available. The first one she realized when trying on that the ties were not just decorative, but functional. Not trusting the chivalry of 8th grade boys not to pull those strings, she vetoed that one. She puts on the second one...and low and behold...it fits! The bottoms ride a little lower than she is used to, but she likes the colors and style enough to deal with that minor thing.
After we settled on the suit we walked around Wally World getting a few last minute things she needed for the trip and then went home. Something that usually takes at least 3 hours...sometimes days... took less that 20 minutes. It seems this year was finally the year that was easy. I wonder how karma will pay me back?
posted by Raven @ 10:30 AM   6 comments